Pairing: If you can't figure it out you've got a problem. XD
Genre: Yaoi/Drama/Minor sexuality.
Summary: Some lines just shouldn't be blurred such as right and wrong, hyung and dongsaeng.
Comments: 8DDD;; This is my very first Big Bang fic and I'm a little nervous about it. Please leave me comments with constructive criticism or encouragement!
A nuzzle to your neck and the slight brush of lips against your throat and for a split second the world seemed to freeze. The sound of your breath hitching sounds odd to you and you have to resist the urge to slide fingers into hair. You may have thought about this before and about how it might feel but now that it was more than just a simple fantasy, your gut twisted into a feeling akin to guilt.
You refused to touch him at first but that didn't seem to bother him nor hinder his advances and soft whispers of 'it's ok, hyung' brought no relief to your tightened chest but the permission was oh so tempting. His teeth against your jaw and suddenly you find yourself pinning the boy that had been looming over you to the mattress. Lips and teeth make quick work along a jaw line and down to a throat and the sounds of soft moans and whimpers are like a melody and you want to hear more, so much more. For about thirty seconds your mind is nothing but an incessant blur and all you can feel is the heat rising off his body below you and the goose bumps that form over skin. You don't even realize that your hands have started to wander over his torso and finding their way under the shirt that separates his skin from yours. A sudden roll of hips from below that meet yours and once more the fast pace of the world comes to a body crushing halt and your eyes snap open, all ministrations on the youth below you stopping.
"Fuck...I can't do this..."
The murmur of words was more to yourself than the boy you're still straddling and you're almost too afraid to look at him. You're not sure if you'd see disappointment, fear or worse...lust.
It's hard to ignore the tug to your wrist as you climb off the bed and to your feet and even more difficult to resist the plea to stay. All you can bring yourself to do is give him a faint smile and a kiss to the forehead before you leave the room.
In the hallway, back pressed to the wall near his door it feels like your chest might explode and it's difficult to breathe, difficult to think with the activity going on below the belt. The arousal makes you shiver but the guilt makes you feel like you could vomit at any second. Running your hands up over your face and through hair, you force yourself to take a few deep breaths before slipping into the bathroom before someone else sees you in this state.
You haven't masturbated in a long time, normally able to control your sexual urges better than any guy you've met. Even after you finish, head back against the tile of the shower and the warm water running over your body that's ice cold and piercing your skin, you feel dirty. He's just a kid, just a kid that crawled all over you the second you sat down on the bed next to him.
The sound of your head smacking against the tile in frustration resonates throughout the stall of the shower and you curse yourself for being stupid. You're the leader of the group, Kwon JiYong, and you'll be damned if you let the lines blur between hyung and dongsaeng.